The effects of a long forgotten macarena challenge

So the macarena challenge of literally yester year.
not suprisingly to me it worked fairly well. the macarena really is the vigorous even if slightly ridiculous fun i remembered. after a week of half an hour to two hours of steady macarena i lost 5 and half kilos. of course i am no doctor, nor do i dabble in economics but doing the macarena to music is a far sight cheaper than buying and relying on protein shakes, info-mercial fads and special weight loss cereals.
the other day i went on facebook, yes it's true i also find it hard to function witout a daily dose of seeing what my vague aquaintances are doing, and an old friend of mine openly asked "who wants to come to zumba with me?".

i felt as if someone had shot me, my friend had fallen victim to the horrible corporate vampire of zumba fit. my opinion stills stands, i hate the way that companies make dishonest money of people with real problems. or the fact that all their advertising makes people with no real life threatening problems think they have them.
there is nothing worse than going through the day thinking you look fine and that all the people giving you funny looks are just curious as to why you are so comfortable with yourself and then someone tells you the hem of your skirt's come down or you spilt sauce all over yourself without noticing. those late night ads are like someone comming up to in the street and saying "i'm sorry to be the one to tell you this but, you have a muffin top, you should pay me lots of money to help you fix that so people won't hate you"

i know this isn't how they literally market but it's what it feels like. if i don't buy this then i must be fat and not care about my health. if i don't buy this what will other people think of my horrid 2 kilos of fat that is evenly distributed around my entire body? am i really that skinny? oh no my thighs wobble! is there any end to this agony?!

doctors, personal trainers, nutritionalists, all these avenues are there and if you are truly concerned then you should have insurance to cover a fair few of those costs.

late night fitness info-mercials. a wopping big say what?.

Zumba Fit: and the effects of the macarena challenge

So what is zumba fit?
zumba fit is the new late night shopping,get fit quick,sheds those pounds,go down 15 dress sizes;craze.
it claims to be the most fun blend of aerobics and latin dance around. it activates 3 whole levels of your body to create the ultimate workout.
and guess what? you can join the zumba fitness craze for only 149.99 plus delivery!

ok now that you know the bollocks that the tv commercial will feed you, here's something to think about.

zumba is basically the same thing as spending 20 minutes doing the exercises from an aerobics or latin dance dvd worth $3.40 at golo. the same fitness results can be acheived by dancing around your bedroom like a 11 year old girl with a drink bottle in each hand. seriously, do you remember when you were a kid and you would dance like crazy to stupid songs? ever stop to think why kids are so skinny?

and if you were so concerned with getting fit that you would pay 149.99 plus delivery for 4 dvds and a set of pissy hand weights then you shouldn't be up that late to see zumba ads. you should be in bed asleep, tired from that 2 hours of working out that you did at the fucking gym.

from the looks of the people in picture i'm not sure if i would even purchase zumba after seeing that pic. they all look like they belong in a teen pop group. the outfits are stupid. they're probably all failed actors trying to grab some extra cash by looking like they're enjoying being ripped off by zumba fit. good on them for getting paid for something but god, it's fucking zumba. zumba sounds like a rip off the lion king's simba

in fact i'm so annoyed with zumba that instead of wasting upwards of 180.00 dollars i'm taking on the week long macarena challenge.

remember the macarena?

it was recorded in 1992 by los del rio and released as a rumba in 1993. in 1995 it became a major hit. it's also been voted as VH1's #1 greatest one hit wonder of all time. after 1996 it is recorded on wikipedia to still have a "cult" following. if by cult they mean every primary in N.S.W's P.E dance program, then yes it does have a cult following. as a kid most of what i remember from primary school is every week we would have dance and we would spend a solid hour doing the macarena, the time warp and the nut bush. guess what? we were all skinny, healthy kids.

better than that we had fun doing these dances, sure they're not the best looking routines out there. they're not very impressive but thats the beauty of it, once taught(which takes ten seconds) anyone can do it. it has no cost apart from the macarena cd you dig out of cuppboard.

in fact the macarena looks kinda stupid it's so simple, but thats what makes it fun.

so i decided fuck zumba, lets bring on the macarena challenge.

i'm going to see how much weight i loose, starting today, purely by doing the macarena for 30 minutes each night to any song of my choosing. note i will still be eating and drinking the same crap that i have been for many years.

my weight today was 58 kilos. i did half an hour of the macarena to children collide, boys like girls(don't know why) , blue king brown and ida maria. by the end of it i hadn't lost any weight but i felt tired, like i should. it worked out my abs, legs and arms. you know what, i also had heaps of fun doing it, even alone it was great. i thought of how stupid i must look and it made me laugh. thats what exercise should be: fun not fucking exspensive.

so zumba:

Myspace Birthday Reminder

For legal reasons i can't put up a picture of the myspace logo but for anyone who knows myspace(everyone) you'll know what it looks like.

for those of you who don't god knows why'd you be on blogger.

i personally forgot that myspace even sent out birthday reminders anymore considering i havn't received one in over 3 years. but lo and behold today i open up my email account to find myspace is reminding me of a "friend's" birthday. for one thing, myspace, if these people were really our close friends then we shouldn't need some two bit advertising whore of a social networking site to "remind"us when their birthday is. as a close friend or even a friend in passing we should make a point of knowing it well enough to at least send them some sort of message around the time of their birthday.

even if we lazy enough to not knowthe date, that reminder comes once in a blue moon and not dead on every year like it's supposed to. i seriously can't remember the last time myspace sent me a reminder of something that i actually cared about let alone something that was actually happening.

the person in question it was reminding me of was only a friend on myspace terms. ie: not a friend. i met that person only once and accepted their friend request only to make it look like i had friends to the billions of other people out there who will judge me on my friend count. i personally dislike these people. i don't like myspace's advertising, every time i go on it assaults me with images,causes,shops,clothing lines,perfumes,britney's new cd,britney's new tour,britney's new break down. fuck! i don't care about this shit.

the only thing myspace is good for is advertising myself. i know hypocritical but i don't care, i think it's acceptable to advertise myself with a myspace page as long as i'm not shoving it in people faces with flashing screens and promises of britney's newest breeakdown video.

so on the original topic, myspace birthday reminders:

Garters: the first of many, many whats.

The Garter.

some of you may be saying what already just at the word.

a garter is a peice of clothing nowadays typically made with elastic which is used to keep up a stocking, sock and even sleeves. it looks a little something like this.

now that you have an idea of what it is i shall tell you why i say what.

i actually happen to own a leg garter, even though in this day and age the garter is superfluous and it's job is done by the stocking itself. i thought i'd put it on.

apparently they are meant to make you feel sexy, look sexy and symbolise deflowering in their removal by a male counterpart. now i know what sexy feels like and what it looks like.

this was neither. it made me feel like a small snake was trying to constrict my leg and made me look like a hippo in a corset. it was not sexy in the least and in fact it was the right size. this is another one of those things that would only look good if you're either impossibly toned or impossibly thin and would probably be a far way to good looking even then. and then come on these things were invented hundreds of years ago, people have been looking bad and probably feeling bad for that long it's horrible.

then there's the sock garter. my oh my.

there's a what.

sock garters making men look less like men and a little bit more like a young forest gump. if you're socks are falling down then usually it means that you need new socks, or to just lift a lazy finger and pull the god damn things up.

of course how could i forget the garter belt. i would put a picture but i think it's a little higher than PG13. the garter belt looks better than the leg garter i must confess, but it's rarely used as a practical item of clothing and more or less as a fetish item.

garters, fashionable? functional? worth the effort?

from me Garters get a